s l o w e r

I heard this song today and it resonated with me. There are times I am too quiet, too conscious on not feeding fires, on not lowering myself to the drama and the negativity people seem to revel in at times. But there are times I also don’t say anything because I don’t like to upset the stars quo in a relationship even if it’s things I need, want or desire. I try to play it cool, to act like everything is ok and grand, afraid of the response, of forcing someone to do something they don’t want to. I don’t like who I am when I feel like that, I know I hide, I know I bury myself in fake smiles and politeness and that’s not fair to anyone. One day I will be brave, and one day I will be able to say what I can’t say to you..

Playing cool makes me lose my mind
I can’t be someone I don’t recognize
I’m not the type to have to say it twice
Or wait for you ’til the end of the night
I’ve been falling fast and you don’t seem to move
But is it worse for me, If I tell the truth?
And are you just a poison that I shouldn’t use?
Wish I could say to you…What I can’t say to you

CREDITS

♔ Poses: Ana Poses  Puvirnutuq

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